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i just... has lots of stupid ideas in my head lol And this is one of them

A Touken Ranbu drabble, featuring my saniwa OC, Nana Nanami.
I'm terribly sorry for all the OOC-ness, misconcept with the game, grammar error, and any other mistakes.

Umm... Enjoy...?

===================================================================

It was already night time by the time loud voices heard in front of a certain citadel, making the female saniwa lives there spun around and made her way to the source of voices. She heard one of the voices clearly as she gets closer. Ah, it’s Namazuo’s voice. Nana sent him and other five sword boys to the frontline today. She dislikes—scratch that—hate the idea of sending them into dangerous zone, but alas, this is hers and their duty. The sky blue eyed girl tries to keep her mind positive, hoping to see no one get hurt.

“Good work for today, everyone. Did any--” Nana smiles, but her calm face turned into a frightened one. In front of her, her fear just came true. Namazuo’s bleeding, obviously heavily damaged judging from his wounds. Honebami tried his best to keep his brother standing, with the help of Kashuu. Upon noticing his master, Namazuo grins weakly.

“Ah... Aruji... We—“

“Do-don’t speak! U-ummm....!” She panicked. Her mind is suddenly in a mess. What to do... what to do... Oh right! “Honebami-san, Kashuu-san, please bring him inside!”

The young saniwa dashed, searching for the equipment. Where is it?! Nana panicked even more when she can’t find the specific tools. Why?!

“Aruji, calm down!” She gasped in surprise as a hand made contact her shoulder. It was Jirou, with a very worried expression upon looking at his panicked master.

“Ji-Jirou-san...? I...”

“Please calm down first... Panicking won’t get you anywhere.” Per the feminine-looking man’s wish, Nana tried to calm herself down. She tried to breathe calmly. And after minutes, Nana got back her rationality that was lost.

“I... Thank you very much Jirou-san, I just...” Jirou pats Nana’s head understandingly. He knows how much she cares for them, even if they’re only weapons.

“Sshh... It’s okay...” Nana nods, trying to hold back her tears. When Jirou hands her the usual equipment, she’s really grateful of him. Without wasting more time, the raw sienna haired runs to where Namazuo is. Nana was informed that Honebami and Kashuu already laid him on the bed and taking care of most of his wounds, so now it’s up to her to fix the rest.

Seeing the unconscious figure, her heart began to race again. Nana Nanami did what she needs to do, ‘repairing’ Namazuo. It takes sometimes before she finally finished. This time, she should wait for the ‘repairing’ process completed and let Namazuo rest. Silence enveloping the whole room. Sounds of chatting from the passerby outside can be heard for a while, before it’s silent again.

She feels so weak. It is the frontline, how come she naively thinks no one will get hurt? Anyone bound to get hurt! She begins to tremble, imagining how much more similar scenes she’ll witness in the future. No... She doesn’t want this!

Drop by drop slides on her white cheeks. Why did she agree to carry this mission? She’s so weak-hearted, definitely not the ideal strong-willed saniwa. She is not as good as ‘him’.

Him...

Nana begins to tremble even more. No... Why she gets reminded of ‘him’ now, out of all time she has?! Every memory she locked deep down filled her mind once again. ‘His’ face, ‘his’ voice...

‘His’ playful, yet at times serious personality... ‘His’ somehow lonely gaze...

Just like Namazuo...

She snapped. No, no! If she thinks like that, then--! The moment she looked at Namazuo again, it wasn’t him that she saw.

Blurry image of a smiling, yet bloody face was what she thinks she looks at.

The saniwa rushed outside. Anywhere, anywhere not near him is fine! Her delicate foot brought her to near fish pond in the garden, where she tries to catch a breath. Blankly stares at the moon reflection, Nana stood there silently. Minutes later, another batch of tears fell, though this time, it’s a waterfall.

She can’t stop it. As the tears wet her eyes and cheeks, Nana thinks how she’ll handle it if the worst case scenario happened, what if one, or worse, some swords break in the frontline? She thinks of all the summoned sword boys as her family, people precious to her. Can she handle this kind of loss...

....again...?

The woman is so lost in thought that she got too close to the pond, and upon her realization, she already fell into the pool of cold water. This little accident sure brought the sword boys attention, with Honebami and Kashuu now running towards her, helping their ‘clumsy’ aruji get out of the pond.

Nana just chuckled awkwardly, dodging the questions to her by saying that she was just lost in thought that she didn’t notice the pond at all, and basically, she’s alright. Not everyone seems to buy it, so she just forced them to get back inside and rest, insisting there’s nothing to be worried of.

As soon as the last person got inside, Nana followed, but stopped on her track and dart her eyes to the sky. She prayed, with all her heart, that she’ll never have to hear or even witness one of the boys ‘broken’. On her way back to her own room, Nana passed by the room where Namazuo rests. Not having enough courage to check on him, the saniwa walks away.

‘I don’t want to... experience that kind of feeling again... At least... not yet...'
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